It has been a while since
The Gambler in me has been to the casino or made a wager. It's been about two weeks!
This is highly unusual considering that I make the bulk of my income from gambling. Maybe it's something to do with trading. In the past month, I've informed my higher ups that I'm giving up gambling to pursue being a full-time Investor. Giving up thousands of dollars a month to pursue an unknown is risky and dangerous, but my higher ups and I agree it's a smart move.
Being back at the casino was a recreational affair. Even though I've changed the amount of resources devoted to gambling, I still approached gambling from a professional perspective. I suppose I can never give up this way of thinking, because it's too deeply ingrained in me.
I'd like to walk my loyal readers through this professional perspective.
The first thing I do when I walk into a casino is to redeem my free slot play bonuses. This particular casino that I went to gives out free play for the stupidest things. Just go through any promotional fliers and dumpy local magazines and you'll probably find at least a $100 worth of free play a month.
Before I use my free slot play, I enter a free sports contest. The sports contest is a free weekly parlay card without any point spreads. The parlay was easy. Without any point spreads, I pick all the teams that are favored to win outright. I fill out a few more parlay cards than the casino would like, but they don't stop me. Each card is worth about $25 to $50 a week.
The funny thing about free slot play is that I never use them on slot machines. I walk on over to my favorite progressive video poker machines. The meters are pretty high today. I whip out my phone and load up my excel sheet. I punch in the values. The game is worth approximately 1.82% for about $50 an hour in addition to the free slot play that has been loaded onto my rewards card. $50 an hour isn't too bad. That's more than a lot of people make, but there's no seat available. The smarter than average local degenerates have locked down these machines. Too bad.
I walk on over to the hidden corner with the older machines. This particular video poker machine was made in the 90's and look it. There's no LCD display. The sounds sound like Nintendo midi sounds. I'm not too upset playing old machines, because I'm a bit of a retro video gamer myself. I can still beat the shit out of Mario Brothers in about 30 minutes. I run my free slot play through this particular machine and cash out the free money. The edge from this machine is about .15%, so I expected to get all my slot play out. Unfortunately, variance deals me a cruel hand and I only get half of the free money out. I'm complaining about only getting half of the free money that I'm suppose to be getting. :)
I make my rounds through the table games. While I'm doing my rounds, I'm keeping my ears open because there's a raffle contest going on every 15 minutes. The first prize is about $25000 and an extra $25000 for my trading stake wouldn't be too bad. I estimate the raffles to be only worth an extra $4. Surprisingly, this raffle was the most exciting part of the day. Little things.
I walk through the blackjack tables, the carnival game tables, and the poker tables. I'm hoping that my x-ray vision is good today and I can see some face down cards. After walking around the casino, it looks like I'll be dealing with the normal visible color spectrum. My x-ray vision isn't working and I will have to do things the hard way. Too bad. When I can see face down cards, I'm making the big bucks.
I make a quick mental note of all the blackjack tables. I hover over a freshly dealt blackjack table. I stand around and count the cards as they are being dealt. Too many low counts. Next table. Too many low counts. Next table. Okay, a few decent tables hovering around a count of +3 or +4. I win some. I lose some. The amount I win is slowly edging upwards.
One notable hand stands out. The count is +5 for a 2% return on investment. I sense this +5 hand is the last hand before the shuffle. I put a big bet out on the table. Everybody is staring at me. I am betting 30x bigger than what most of the people at this packed table are betting. Some people are holding their breaths as I'm about to play my hand. The women at the table think I'm risky. I give them my cool confident smile.
I get a a hand total of 11 and the dealer has a 4 showing. I grab an extra big bet and double down. I have two big bets on the table. The girl to the right of me shakes her head. I get a 4 for a total of 15. No problem. The dealer will bust with her 4.
The dealer flips an Ace. Draws a card. She gets a 3 for a soft 18. I lose both my bets. People at the table shake their heads at me. Too bad. I walk away in fake shame as the dealer shuffles.
I continue my card counting. Play a few more positive tables. The money again goes up and down with a slight positive upwards, so subtle that I'm probably imaging it.
I wait for the end of the raffle. I didn't win any of the raffles. I'm not surprised, because of the of the estimated 1 in 2500 chance.
I do my final accounting and I'm up a good amount today. Tired from all the walking I get back to my car and drive home alone.
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